It's The Weekend Baby!

This Made my Day!

I needed a good laugh this morning. Whew...I know...It's sad...But that's how I have been feeling lately...

The weekend has finally made it here, and I am so ready for it. I stayed up late working and got up at the crack of dawn to finish up, so that I could have some free time today. It's supposed to rain all weekend, and I am prepared to do the things that lovers do in the rain...

This weekend is all about my Boo and I. Well, that's how it's supposed to be. I'll still be at home, so I am sure that I will be interrupted, by a little drama. I was suppose to go and get dolled up today, but I'll wait for that. There's no need to waste the money because it will just get messed up, if you know what I mean.

I don't want to go anywhere this weekend, seeing that I have done something almost everyday this week. I am partied out! I also bought me some new loungewear. Who says that you can't look good while your bummin'!

I plan on eating good food, while in the company of the man that I love, watching movies, having good sex, and letting the rain fall... Now that's what I call a weekend!

What is your idea of a good weekend?

A Sneak Peek Into My Past...

This morning I woke up crying. I do the same thing every year around this time, all of my friends do. We were calling each other before sunrise. But how long does it take to heal from past hurts? You would think that I let it go by now, but something are just too hard to let go of. There a 3 major events in my life, that have hurt me deeply. Some people would have broken down over some of the things that I have gone through. I shared one of my tragedies in a post titled (Be Careful What you Wish For)...This is number two. I'm sure I will share the third event sometime in the future...

Blogging has become my self-induced therapy. I blog with a purpose...not for entertainment...I blog to get things off my chest that would I normally not discuss. This may read like a story out of a book for some, but for me, it is another piece of "baggage" that I am letting go of, so that I can go on.. Well, here goes...

It was the summer before freshman year. We were all so excited. We were going to high school and I couldn't wait! We had all worked odd jobs here and there over the summer to save up for the latest fashions, and we were ready! But little did we know that this summer would change us all forever.

I had a very special friend, and Kya was her name. She just loved life in general. Her mother died when she was young, so she spent a lot of time with my family. My house was the house in the neighborhood where all the kids hung out....She was a chubby kid, kinda tall for her age, so she gave the appearance that she was much older. She always wore shirts with sleeves(even in the summer), and her left eye never really moved when much. Some kids at school made fun of her, but she was my friend. She moved to Dallas from a small town near Louisiana. Her father was a single parent, very quiet, and to us, he was mysterious. My father always said that there was something wrong with him, but we just felt like maybe he just missed his wife. We didn't find out the whole story until after IT happened.

Whenever someone would ask her how her mother died, she would get this blank look on her face and say, "She was sick, and NO I don't want to talk about it." So we left it alone. We all hung out on a daily basis, but she started coming around less and less. My mom asked her is everything was okay and she would say smiling, everything is fine. She said, "My dad just needs my help around the house more," so we didn't think anything of it.

I always knew that bad things went on in the world, but never did I think that it would hit so close to home. This quiet, suburban neighborhood where we lived was about to be shaken up a bit. We had all planned to go to this big Back To School Party. We had already gotten our outfits, and we were ready. It was the Friday before school was to begin and we were about to get our first real taste of high school boys for the first time. Looking back, it's kind of funny, but you couldn't tell my ANYTHING back then. We were meeting at my house, and my mom and dad were dropping us off, and picking us up ...Two carloads of us...but they wanted to make sure we got there and back safely. Kya never showed up. I called her house 3 times but there was no answer. So we left.

As we passed by her house, all the lights were out, and since their garage was in the back of the house, we didn't know if they were home or not. I regretted not going over and ringing the doorbell for a long time, but I am pretty sure that it would not have changed anything...

I didn't see or hear from Kya all weekend. We were all worried. My dad even went by their house, but no one came to the door, and he said the house was quiet. We started school that Monday, still no Kya. She was supposed to have two classes with me, but never showed up.

Tuesday morning, my mom went to the police. They were really not concerned at all. They gave her the run around, and eventually showed up Tuesday afternoon. It was only after Kya's father's boss had expressed his concerns to the police, that they finally did something. Her father never missed work, and he was out on Friday, Monday, and Tuesday, so they were concerned. The police finally went into the house. What they found was not pretty at all. Kya's father had molested his daughter, killed her, then shot himself. Kya had a younger sister (so we thought), that was away with her aunt for the weekend, so she survived the mishap.

I was in disbelief! I didn't hear any gun shots. How could I have not known that something was wrong with her? I blamed myself for a long time. Not for what he did, but for not being a better friend. After that day, I vowed to be a real friend, to anyone that I chose to invite into my life...Hence the reason I tend to be TOO good to my friends!

To our surprise. It didn't even make the news, newspapers...NOTHING! My parents were outraged! My father set out to find out more about these people, and do something about how our town chose to just overlook the fact that a man had done something like this to his child, and nothing was said about it. I mean, in Texas, EVERYTHING is on the news! He just kept saying it over and over. " My child was in that house... My child has been alone in that house with that man. What if he would have snapped while my child was there?" He found the info that he set out find. He saved all the newspaper clippings. I don't know if it was to remind himself of how lucky he was to have a good family or not. But he seemed to be a different man after that day. Not better or worse, just different.

It turns out that Kya's mother had not just died of some disease as we thought. A few years earlier, when Kya was in the sixth grade, Kya's father had molested her older sister. Her sister was 15 and pregnant with her father's child. She was five months pregnant when she finally revealed who the father of the child was. Kya's mother could not live with this type of shame. Instead of turning her husband into the police, she set her family and herself on fire in the middle of the night. Kya's mother and younger brother died instantly. Her sister, who was very badly burned, delivered the baby 4 months early. She named the baby Miracle. The mother died soon after the baby was born, but the baby survived. All the time I knew Kya, I thought that the baby was her sister. When we would ask about her little sister, she would say, "Oh yeah...She's not at home." Like she forgot that the kid was her sister. We now knew why.

Kya and her father also survived the fire. Kya's father was burned from the neck down. We noticed the burns, but when we asked her how he got them she just said, "I don't know. That happened a long time ago." Kya only had a burn on her left shoulder and halfway down her arm. Hence the reason she always wore sleeves, but she told us it was a birthmark. (That was just like me back then to notice what she wore, rather than what she was covering up. I still have a lot of that trait in me, but I learned a hard lesson, and that is the reason that I am not so vain today).We found out later that she also had a glass eye...the one that never moved much.

I regretted for a long time not getting closer and finding out more about my friend. I was so wrapped up in myself, and boys, like most teenage girls, that I failed to see the signs. It took me a long time to realize it was not my fault. Yesterday would have been her birthday, and my friends and I...The ones who knew her and share in the hurt...got together at my place and had a drink in her memory. RIP Kya...Your memory will remain in our hearts forever...

I really don't have any thought provoking questions today...I'll just say this, take care of the people you care about because things happen unexpectedly. Be careful of the people that you allow your kids(nieces, nephews, cousins, god-kids...etc.) go around. You never know what type of secrets they may be harboring...

It's Always Something...

It's crazy how people flock to negativity like flies to s***, but when you try to drop something positive, your words fall onto deaf ears.

I haven't been hanging with my friends as much because they can be mentally draining. I must say that I miss them. It's crazy how I wished to be left alone, but when I don't see them, I feel like I'm missing something.

All the guys and gals were in rare form last night. We had a ball. Everyone had a date. Diva was in good spirits, and I was so happy for him. But you know that in the midst of all the happiness, there was drama.

My friend Green Eyes is jealous of my friend Ambitious...Plain and simple. Ambitious is an innovator...He goes after what he wants and makes it happen. Green Eyes does not possess that quality. He waits for things to happen and doesn't like to take chances. For that, he usually misses out on things. Ambitious owns a restaurant/bar/club, and I am a silent partner. All of my friends are aware of this fact. Green Eyes has been jealous of this fact since day one. If any of my friends were to come to me with a legitimate business proposition, and I felt it would work, I would invest in a heartbeat. I never sit and wait for things to happen. Right now, I work for my money, but I want to be at a point to where my money works for me. I am well on my way. My mother does a great job handling our family's finances, but I wanted to take a few chances of my own.

Out of the blue, Green Eyes says, "I have an idea that I would like to talk to you about. " I tell him, okay, and to come by my house later this week. He insists on telling me in front of everyone. He says, "I want to open a store and I need a little help."We all knew that he meant money. I won't go into detail too much, but lets just say, the idea did NOT get my attention. I told him that I would get back to him later. I was out for fun, not business, but he would not let it go. My Boo HATES the fact that my friends come to me for everything. He has commented on it on several occasions, but I never reply because while I am single, what I do with My money is My business!

Green Eyes has always felt that I had a thing for Ambitious. I have never seen Ambitious in that way. I actually met him when we were a lot younger. His girlfriend had just broken up with him, and he was looking pitiful. Puppy love is a mutha! I was going through a rough patch too. One of my good friends was moving out of the country, and I knew I would never see her again. We were sitting there, both in our own worlds. I had my head in my hands and he was pacing. Then he came over to me and asked if I was okay. He was one of the most beautiful creations of the human species. Even in our awkward pre-teen days, he was still fine, with a perfect smile( I later found out that his dad was a dentist) and eyes that seemed to see right through me. I normally don't like to talk to people, but it was like we had an instant connection. Nothing physical, but it was like we were meant to be friends. We talked for hours and found out that we had a lot in common. I have been his friend since that day.

I have been knowing Green Eyes all my life, and I know exactly how he is. He is very successful, but it's never enough. He always wants what others have. Our parents have been friends all our lives. His parents are my godparents and visa versa. He has always been jealous of the fact that he is not my only good male friend. Now he has no problem with my gay male friends, just my straight friend Ambitious. Ambitious is a true friend to me, and that's all. We are quite a bunch. I guess good looking people travel in packs...LOL!

But, Green Eyes had to take it there...He said, "If I was Ambitious, you would have dropped the money on the table in a heartbeat. You give him anything he wants...Always have." At that point All Eyes Were on ME....

It pissed me off to no end, and they all knew it. No one said anything else about it at that point, but I could feel by Boo's eyes burning a hole in the side of my face, waiting for an explanation. I told him we would talk later...He was quiet for the rest of the evening, and I was READY TO GO!

As soon as we got in the car, the questions began. "How long have you and Ambitious been friends? How did you meet? Did you ever date? Have you been giving him money, and for what? Am I missing something here? Can you fill me in so I won't look like an a** next time?"

I didn't think I could get more upset at that point, but this pissed me off even more. I DO NOT like to be questioned! I told him the whole story...He was a little more at ease, but he wanted to know how I left out the fact that I had given Ambitious half the money to start his business.

I said, " I gave him my money because he is my friend. This happened before you and I were an item, and I didn't feel the need to fill you in on all of my finances."

That made him get even more upset. He said, "Does the fact that you are going to someday be my wife count for anything? Now I am kinda glad that you wanted to wait. It seems like we have a lot to learn about each other....and are you two still going to be this close after we are married?'

I don't know why, but that hurt so bad. I know that I had been feeling this way, but for him to actually say what I had been thinking really got to me. I think it's just the fact that he may doubt me. By the time we finally got to the house, I was balling like someone had died. He hugged me tight, but we both knew that we had a long road ahead of us.

I let him know, Ambitious will always be my friend. If we are married, and he needs me for something, I will let you know what's going on for informative purposes, but I will not ask for your opinion. My heart belongs to you, but I love him in a different way. I can tell that he is going to have a very hard time dealing with how close we are, but if he and I are going to be together, he'll have to accept it.

Now as for Green Eyes. He called me twice by the time I got home. He apologized for his actions, and of course blamed it on the liquor. People say what the mean when they're drunk. I told him that it was okay, but I will be feeding him out of a long handled spoon for a while.

That whole scene sparked a reaction in my friends. They were all calling, asking if I was okay, and to make sure that they knew the truth about the relationship shared between Ambitious. Ambitious sent me a text message before I went to bed...I hope you are okay. I'll call you in the morning so we can talk.

He called EARLY this morning. My Boo was meeting his bestfriend at the gym at 5:00 a.m., so it was cool, even though I had no intention on waking up that early. He asked the obvious questions...What did he say? Is he upset? Did you let him know the deal? I hope this doesn't change us?

I assured him that nothing could change us. I love my Boo, but a true friend is VERY hard to find. I would never want to be put in a situation where I had to choose between the two.
So much for missing me friends...

Have you even been put into a situation crazy situation?

Why do people love gossip?

Random Ranting...

In the midst of all my drama, I am able to find peace. My Boo, even with his little faults, is a wonderful man. He regretted the way that he had allowed the Tucker situation to affect us, so he made up for it!

Yesterday, we went to the lake after my daughter got out of school. As you all know, I am not a big fan of "the woods", but this place was really nice. There is a park there for the kids, picnic tables, and a bike trail, which we all took advantage of. Normally, this would be a nice weekend trip for us, I but it is supposed to rain all weekend, and my daughter will be with her dad, so I plan to be hugged up somewhere with my Boo...

He did all the cooking...It's sad to say, but I love to be right. I don't argue, I just sit and listen. Or should I say, I give the other person the illusion that I am actually listening to them. Normally, the other person will talk themselves into trouble. The best thing about getting into an argument, is making up afterwards...I won't go into details, but lets just say...I had a very good evening. ( No friends...No drama...but the week is just getting started.)

Just a few things in my head today...

-If you don't want to hear what I have to say, don't ask me for my opinion.

-If you don't like my hair, or what I'm wearing, please don't tell me, because I don't like yours either, I was just being nice. Obviously , I like it because I have it on!

-If you call me and leave me a message to call you back...Just wait until I call you. Don't keep calling me. I got your message, I just DON'T want to talk to you...

-Do not call my house and say, "Who is this?" when I answer the phone. You called me!

-Don't put on an outfit that looks ridiculous and then ask me, "How do I look?" You know how you looked when you left the house. Don't get mad at me when I tell you the truth.

-Don't ask me if I think you're getting fat. My opinion of getting fat is different from yours. Use your better judgment. If you have a problem fitting the jeans that you wore just last month, it might be time to push away from the table.

-When you call my house to borrow money. Don't beat around the bush with the small talk. Just tell me how much you want and get off my phone.

- If you have no job, don't ask me to borrow money, ask me if you can HAVE it. You can't pay me back. It's okay. If I want you to have it, I'll give it to you regardless.

- If you borrow money from me and the time comes to pay me back, don't keep calling me to tell me all the reasons why you CAN'T pay me. Just call me when you have the money.

-Don't ask me "Is everything is okay"" when you see me dragging my kid out of the store by the collar and she has tears running down her face? I'm fine!

-Don't get mad when I make your kids sit down when they come to my house. Just because you let them tear your s*** up doesn't mean I am going to let them do the same thing to mine.

-Don't get mad when you bring your destructive kids to my house and hide all my daughter's toys before they come. I actually want her to have them after your kids leave.

-Don't tell me, "You think you're all that!" No YOU think I'm all that...Thank you for noticing...

-Don't ask me how much something costs if you have no intention on spending the money to buy it. You are wasting my breath and your time.

-Don't spend your bill money shopping, and then call me for money. Don't expect me to always be there. I try to be there as much as I can...But don't expect me to always bail you out of situations. The day that you really need me, will be the day I'll say no.

- If I am not talking, there is nothing wrong with me. I just don't feel like talking.

- If you are calling me to complain about your man, and you know he is doing you wrong, just hang up the phone before I answer. I will not be upset because you hung up the phone. I am just going to tell you what I think about him and you will just get upset. Save us both the time and stress.

-If you have something bad to say about one of my close friends and you don't want them to know, DON"T TELL ME. I am going to tell them, and then TELL YOU that I told them. End of story.

- If you know me, and you see me, just say hello. It is not necessary to start a conversation with me every time you see me. When I am in the line at the pharmacy and I have a sick child standing beside me, I don't give a d*** about a sale at Saks!

-Please don't ask me, "Where did you get that shirt, or those pants, or those shoes, etc?" I am not going to tell you. I DO NOT want you to have on the same thing. I will conveniently forget every time...

- If you ask me where I am going and I don't invite you to go...Just leave it alone. Don't ask if it is okay if you tag along. If I wanted you to go with me, I would ask.

- Don't call me and ask me how my Boo and I are doing, and then start trying to find things wrong in my relationship. I can think for myself. If my Boo wanted to know how you would act in a situation, he would be in a relationship with you, not me. Worry about you!

-Don't try to hook me up with your brothers, cousins, homeboys, etc...If they are 30, jobless, have no car, have 3 different baby-mammas...and have no intention on doing anything about it...There is a reason why they are still single...Don't get mad at me when I say no thanks. It has nothing to do with you and me.

-Don't have a big wedding after you have lived with a man for 10 years and the two of you already have 3 kids. It's a waste.

-If you see that my daughter is not at home, It is a sign...Don't ask me to keep your kids. The answer is NO.

- If you have a man in your life that doesn't like your kids, MOVE ON. He is SO not worth it. Never choose a man over your child.

What gets on your nerves?

He Is Trippin'

I think there is something in the air in Dallas...Fatal attractions are really taking a toll on my relationship. First him, now me!

This weekend, my Boo and I took my daughter to the Arts Festival chaired by E. Badu. It was very nice, to say the least. It was an experience that I am sure she will never forget.

http://www.urbanartsfest.com/

I saw this guy that I used to date, Tucker, at the festival. I must say that he was looking great. The way that linen suit was draped over his muscles made me do a double take. The off-white contrasted with his chocolate skin perfectly...It was a sight to see. He came up to us and said hello, and he introduced me to his lady friend. I introduced him to my Boo, as my friend and that was it, so I thought. The reason Tucker and I never worked, was because he was a "Bug-a Boo" in the words of Destiny's Child. I really put it on him...purposely...but I regretted it later. He was inexperienced, and I turned him out! He had a nice sized tool, but that was it! He was fine, and very popular with the ladies in public, but he had no clue what he was doing behind closed doors. By the time I was finished with him, he was a pro. You know how some people go crazy when you put it on them...Tucker was no exception...He lost his mind. I have never had a piece that good..that I lost my mind! He turned into a freak( a borderline sex addict). He wanted it all the time.
He was very good to me, but after a while I wasn't feeling him like he was feeling me anymore.

He was smothering me. Calling me all the time. E mailing me. Sending me flowers (and I'm allergic to d*** near everything and he knew it), buying me things...and everywhere I went, he wanted to go. If I went out to the mall, to lunch or the club with my girls, he wanted to meet us there. He was driving me crazy. I was into a lot of things, and he wanted to be a part of everything.

I love taking long, hot bubble baths. It's my chance to get away from everything. No matter where I live, my bathroom has to be huge, and really nice. Whenever I was in the bathtub for a long time, he would knock on the door and keep asking, "Are you okay? When are you coming out? I'm missing you already " I had to draw the line. I told him how I felt, and he went ballistic. He said that women would love to have a man like him. Good looking, sexy, good job, nice car, nice crib, and spent more than enough time with them...

Maybe I'm different. I HAVE to have my space. The only time we were apart was when we were working. He was at my house as soon as he got off work, and I couldn't even go to the store alone. My daughter never really talked to him. When he came over, she would just go in her room and play. I never really introduced her to him, and neither of them seemed to mind. I deducted major cool points for that. He seemed sort of jealous of the relationship that I had with my daughter (I didn't really pick up on this in the beginning, until he started making comment...). He wanted me ALL to himself. He even went shopping with my mother and I. It drove me nuts! So I had to break it off. He still kept calling...kept coming by...begging me to take him back. He said that he would change. So I, like a dumb a** took him back. It went well for about 3 months, and then he was back to his old habits. Then one day he asked, "Why is your daughter always at home? You know your mother loves keeping her, why won't you let her go over there for a while?" I said, "She lives here!" I broke it off for good. NO MAN comes before my child. But, he still kept calling off and on up until about a year ago. He started bringing toys and all sorts of things by for my daughter. Sorry buddy, but my daughter is not for sale. I didn't take any of his gifts... He stopped, so I took it that he had found someone to put his energy into. It was a mess. He just didn't get it. I hated the fact that he smothered me, but the thing I hated most was that he didn't understand the fact that MY CHILD COMES FIRST!.

I guess seeing him must have sparked up and old flame because he stopped by my parent's house on Sunday afternoon. We(me, my Boo, my brother & his girlfriend and my parents) were all in shock when he came. My mother is a very sweet person, so of course she invited him in, and told me that he asked to speak to me in the other room. Reluctantly, I went in to talk to him. I looked back at my Boo, and he had this unfamiliar look on his face...was he jealous?
Tucker greeted me with a hug and kiss on the cheek, and I quickly pulled away. I turned to make sure that my Boo was still in the other room. Tucker told me that he missed me, and he wanted to try to make it work again. I told him that I was very happy with my Boo, and I would not do anything to jeopardize my relationship. It was like he wasn't hearing me or something, because he kept on going on and on about how he still loved me, and wanted me back. I asked him to leave, and as I was doing so, my Boo walked in the room. He said, "Are you okay Babe(that's what he calls me) ? I said yes, and he came and stood beside he. Then he said to Tucker, "The lady asked you to leave." Tucker looked at him, then back at me, then he got up, said goodbye, and left.

He has been calling me non-stop. My number has been the same for the past few years for business purposes. I do a lot of business with Tucker's company, so he still calls for legitimate reasons from time to time.

What has me upset in the whole situation is...my Boo is upset with ME. I don't know if he feels threatened by this man or what, but he is acting a fool. Last night when we got in, I felt like I was in an interrogation room...It really got on my nerves. He said that I lit up when I saw Tucker at the arts show(It was shock...I knew that he would start calling me again...). I didn't tell my Boo that Tucker was my Ex for this very reason...I didn't want to have to go through all the awkward questions. Tucker kept calling last night, so I finally let my Boo answer the phone, and he stopped calling.

My Boo needs to get a grip...He has no room to talk, with all that I went through for him and his psycho Ex last week! But I am not one to throw things back into people's faces. He was too upset to sleep last night, so he went home. The sun was barely peeking over the clouds this morning, and he was up calling me. Of course I didn't answer, so he kept calling. I finally answered, and he wanted to know if I was still upset with him. Huh? Was I upset in the first place? This s*** really has him trippin'.

He only has to work a half day today, and wants to spend the afternoon "making up", but I told him that I have a lot of work to do(which I don't). I just think he needs a little time to reflect on how silly he is acting. As bad as I wouldn't mind "making up" with him, it would defeat the purpose if I give in to his craziness (Maybe later on tonight...LOL)...I put up with his s***, but the first time something gets thrown his way, he can't take it. I don't think so!

I blocked Tucker's numbers from my phone, and this fool called me this morning from a pay phone. He wanted to make sure that I was happy with my Boo. Then he started the whole, "Why couldn't you be happy with me like that" conversation all over again. I hung up he phone and blocked that number as well. Oh well, I guess I'll just have to wait until he gets tired again.

Have you ever had someone(friend, family, ex-lover) in your life that can't let go.

Have you ever ended a relationship with a nice person because they were smothering you?

Have you ever had someone who cared for you, but you didn't care for them the same?

Just Be Real...

Why do people feel the need to be something that they are not?

As I mentioned in my post yesterday, my Boo's best friend's girl tries to make everyone happy...IMPOSSIBLE...She wants everyone to be friends, and tries to find a silver lining to every cloud. She brags about how she is not jealous. How she can handle anything. How she can get any man that she wants... I could see straight through her. She is a good person, with a good heart. But what is she covering?

My Boo's best friend is a clown. He jokes all the time. Sometimes it's cool, but he has been known to take a joke too far.

Yesterday evening, my Boo and I cooked dinner for his best friend and his girl. We all talked over dinner. As much as I didn't want to talk about it, I knew the events from the weekend would come up sooner or later. My Boo's best friend kept making cracks about it, but I wasn't laughing....My Boo was irritated by the whole scenario, so the debate began...

Boo: Hey man, that's enough?
Boo's BF: What? I heard your ex got knocked the F*** Out(imitating Smokey on Friday).
(I chuckeled a little to that...)
Boo: You're joking, but this is my life we're talking about here. Let it go.

(My Boo's BF saw that he wasn't playing, so he dropped it. His girl picked up where he left off)

BF's Girl: Well, I don't understand why you guys couldn't just talk it out. You stooped to her level. Fighting is so childish. If you are doing what you are supposed to in your relationship, you wouldn't have to fight. Maybe you felt like you were lacking something. Maybe you were lashing out at her because of your insecurities.

Me( Did she just say that? Breathe deeply...): Been there. Done that. Didn't work!...And I am very secure in my relationship. I fought her for disrespecting my home. At that point, it was about principle. It was a lesson she had to learn.
BF's Girl: I used to think you were so classy when I first me you. The way you carried yourself, the way you spoke. I thought it was nice.
Me( keep it togehter girl): I am the same woman. Circumstances have the ability to change the way a person acts.
BF's Girl: Nothing can change me.
Me: So you mean to tell me, if your man's ex walks into your house and tells you that she wants him, you would talk about it? Yeah right...
Boo(with a smirk): Maybe she can't fight..
BF: I don't know. I've never seen her throw down...
BF's Girl: I can fight...Believe me. I just think that violence is not the answer. Your man's Ex came by my office this morning, and I looked at her face, and it is ridiculous. I just feel like two grown women can find a better way. She said that she is going to leave it alone, but did it have to come to blows? I thought you were better than that!
Me: Nope guys, she can't fight...(Boo, BF , and I are laughing). Better than what?
BF Girl: No, I can fight, I just don't... Better than these ghetto a** women out there. You acted just like them.
Me: Call me what you want. I have more class than you will ever have. So don't hate. I refuse to be disrespected by anyone. That includes you...

My Boo looks at me to make sure that I am calm. I give a look that tells him I am cool. ( Am I that bad. I really do need to work on fighting. Every time I get upset with a woman, he looks to make sure that I am not about to throw blows. I fight, only when necessary. This was just a debate. I can handle my own in a conversation. I was just letting her get these things off her chest... He says to his boy, "Check your girl."

BF( in efforts to lighten then mood): Well, I have something that I need to get off my chest...
BF's Girl(w/ a curious look in her eyes and cracking voice): What?
BF: I have been seeing someone else for 3 months. This is just not working for me. You know...you and I.
BF's Girl: Who is she?
BF: It doesn't matter. You're not jealous, and you handle yourself with dignity. So why do you need to know? Your problem is with me. What? You want to call her and be friends.
BF Girl: I just want to call her and talk. Let her know the real deal.
ME: Uh huh...
BF: I just wanted to get it out there in the open. We would be the first people to know anyway. I have been wanting to tell you for a while now, but I didn't want to hurt your feelings. But now that I see that you can handle anything, and you don't let things get to you, I feel it's okay to let you know.
BF's Girl (yelling): I can't believe you would do something like this to me. When I find out who it is...It's gonna be on!


Then my Boo's best friend starts laughing uncontrollably and said, I was just playing baby, almost falling out of his chair. I could tell that his girl was about to cry, but he proved a good point. Stop faking and be real. I wanted to laugh too, but I didn't. My Boo...forever the sympathetic man that he is asked..."Are you okay?" What did he do that for? She ran out of the room and started to cry. We all got a good laugh in, even though I knew it was wrong, she had it coming.

I went into the front room where she was and talked to her. I said," Just be true to yourself. Stop trying to make people think you are perfect. Just be you. " She looked at men and said." I have been trying to make people happy for so long, I don't even know who I am anymore." I felt sad for her. I might get into a brawl every now and then but it's always necessary (LOL), and I stay true to me. I know who I am, and what I want. "It has to be a sad reality to not know yourself ." She said," No, I'm not sad." (Again, making excuses, and trying to control the situation). I looked at her, and she looked at me. I didn't say anything because it was her issue to deal with. I have enough going on with my friends and myself to add another one to the bunch. I just got up and went back into the dining room. She came back in and her man apologized. I'm glad my Boo doesn't do me l;ike that... Then she acted like nothing ever happened. Still trying to act like everything was perfect.

I must say, I feel sorry for her, but her issues are something that she will have to deal with on her own...I let her off this time, but she has one more time to say something crazy to me...and it's on! ( No, I'm not gonna fight her...I'll just have a lot more to say. I kept my cool very well this time, and I'm proud of myself.) I could see that she needs a serious reality check!


Do you know people who are fake? Who try to be something that they are not?

Do you know a perfectionist? Do things have to be the way they want them at all times?

My Weekend Fiasco!

As the saying goes, When it rains it pours...Well I must have been in one hellava hurricane this weekend! From Friday evening to Monday morning, it was a whirlwind!


Starting Friday night...

My Boo and I were invited to a birthday party for his best friend. The party was very classy. It was thrown at a downtown hotel. We got there, on CP time (because of me), which had him irritated because he is the prince of punctuality. Everyone in the room was dressed to kill and I loved the vibe...Good music...Smiling faces. That was until I saw one face that I didn't want to see...His ex. Somehow my Boo failed to mention that his ex is still good friends with his best friend's girl. So she invited her to the party. His best firend is naive. She just wants everyone in the world to be one big happy family, but life just isn't like that. So I'm not surprised that she invited her. She tries to be nice to everyone. When she and I met initially, she was on my turf, but now the ball was in her court. She had all of her people around her, and I was at a loss, because other than my Boo, I only knew a few people in the room. We stared at each other for a moment...

Later, she spotted my Boo on the other side of the room talking to a few of his friends. I was seated at our table with a few other girlfriends/wives (waiting for him), and I was getting bored. They were talking about the latest fashions...Who bought what...Who married who...who just had a baby...yada yada yada...

I never lost sight of him, and apparently, neither did she.

Then she did it...she got up and went to talk to him. I kept my cool, remained seated, and watched his every move. She walked up behind him and tapped him on his shoulder. He turned to face her and he got this wild look on his face. He started to play with his right ear, which he does when he gets nervous, he looked right at me and d*** near broke his neck trying to get to our table.

He took me by the hand, and led me onto the dance floor to talk. I guess he didn't want the nosey a** women at our table in our business, which was fine with me. He already knew what I was thinking. He said, "I don't know why she won't leave me alone. She said she wants me." Now I started to get mad. I had given this woman the benefit of the doubt. I sat down and talked to her woman to woman and she promised me that she would go away. Well, I guess she lied.

There's a thin line between being lady like and an a** whopping, and it's called money. I thought about the effort I had put into buying the perfect dress, shoes, jewelry...Getting me hair and nails done, a facial, legs waxed...and I thought twice about grabbing her boney a** right then and there. Little did I know that she would give me the perfect opportunity later.

I danced with my Boo, not saying a word...his mind on keeping me calm and my mind on that woman! I try not to let people get to me...not to let them get in my head...but it was too late. She had crossed the line not once but twice...Disrespect me once, and I let it go, but twice ... That's a big no no in my book. Then she had the nerve to walk over to us. My Boo stepped in front of me, and I just stayed put, and listened. All eyes were on us at this point, because most of the people at the party were friends of his and his best friend(Hence the reason I went took extra measures to look wonderful!),so I suppose they knew the situation.

She looked straight at me, and spoke boldly. She said..."I want him back. I heard you were getting married, and I can't take it...I want him back" I wasn't shocked. I knew that with my Boo being so ready for marriage, he had probably told his best friend that he popped the question, who in turn told his girlfriend, who must have told his ex...So it was cool. I know what I have. He is a very good man, and I can't blame anyone for trying to hold on to a good thing. But, when that good thing is GONE...Let it GO! My Boo said to her, still standing in front of me, "Please leave US alone. You are embarrassing yourself. What we had is gone. LET IT GO, and move on with your life. " She looked at me with the look of hatred in her eyes, and walked away, but I knew from that look that this wasn't over.

After our little fiasco, I was ready to go. I was tired of people watching me, trying to feel me out...See if I was upset, or what the heck I was feeling in general. My Boo sensed how I was feeling, so he said his goodbyes, and we left. That is one of the many things I love about our relationship. We have a non-verbal communication that many people don't have. I can give him a look, and it's like he instantly knows what to do next. He knows my moods and it's like he knows what I am thinking before I say it...I was glad we left. But it was far from over.

Saturday, I get this strange call from Alana (they psycho stalker) and she says that she needs my help. Our daughters had a dance recital Saturday evening, and she wanted to know if I could take her daughter. She said that one of her other kids had a volleyball game that evening, her husband had to work, and there was no way she could get her daughter there in time. Now I know I told this chic to stay away from me, but me, with my "always trying to help somebody" a** tells her that I will pick her daughter up on our way to the recital. Now she thinks we are friends because I helped and, and she's back to her routine of bugging the h*** out of me! She called me Sunday to hang out with her family at the park. I knew I shouldn't have done her a favor. Why can't she see it as a favor and leave it alone. I did it so the little girl wouldn't miss out, NOT FOR HER...and the saga continues...

Saturday night, my daughter leaves the recital with her dad, which give me some "ME" time ( or at least I thought). When I get to my Boo meets me at the door looking crazy. He said that his ex had been following him around, calling, and just basically harassing him all day. She made one big mistake. She followed him to my house.

I live in a very nice neighborhood. One where there are not many of US if you catch my drift. She pulled up in front of my house, and sat in her car. We went in the house like she wasn't even sitting there. My Boo was making me nervous, pacing back and forth, playing with his d** * ear! I finally had to tell him to sit down and chill out. Then the doorbell rang...

I wasn't going to answer it at first...I didn't know what she was capable of...Whether she had a gun, or knife, or what she planned to accomplish. For a I started to call the police on her, but my business with her was not finished. My Boo answered the door. She stood there is skin tight short and a tube top( skinny as h***...It was a mess). So I knew that she had nowhere to hide a weapon. She just stood at my front porch sobbing. My Boo turned and walked away from the door, and left her there. Now it was nothing separating us except the glass on my storm door, and not even that could hold the rage that I was feeling. No one disrespects my space. My home is my comfort zone, and one you invade my space, it's over!

She must have not been thinking, because she let herself in...WTF! She dried her eyes, and stood toe to toe with me. I'm thicker and I had her by about an inch in height. I have to give it to her, the girl had heart, but it led her in the wrong direction today. I grabbed her and commenced to beating the h*** out of her. I gave that girl one of those old, country a** whoopings. You know the kind where your parents used to beat your a** and talk to you at the same time. She was screaming and pleading, and it was like I had blacked out for a second...I had no mercy on her at that moment. After my Boo felt she had had enough, he pulled me off of her. She just laid there on the floor in a fetal position, crying. I could have kicked her...But I think that she had gotten the point by now. She got up slowly...My Boo still had a tight grip on me (he had me in a bear hug)...and started coming towards him. As he was letting me go, she slapped him hard in the face. All I could think was...Is this b**** crazy? I grabbed her by the neck and choked her. I let her go when she started gagging and turning red.

Of course my neighbors called the police. She was arrested, I wasn't, but I got a nice little citation for assault. I called Monday morning, and was scheduled to appear in court Monday afternoon...( I thought that was TOO quick, but apparently I had whooped the daughter of a very prestigious man in Dallas...another fact that I didn't know). My Boo's best friend was able to pull a few strings. The assault charge was dropped and I got off with no fines...she didn't. Plus, she has to do community service. Obviously, this wasn't her first run in with the law. But, we both got a friendly invitation to 12 weeks of anger management, which, at this point for me, doesn't seem like a bad idea...But I am still pissed because this whole situation was unnecessary.

I am glad that I told me Boo that I want to wait to get married because obviously, I have a little more homework to do. Love is blind...But you better believe I have on x-ray goggles right now! We took the time Sunday to come clean... I didn't want any more surprises! We laid everything out on the table, and swore not to look back. I have no BIG skeletons...But this conversation could have made us or broken us. I learned a lot about him that I didn't know. Some things that I like, and some things that I didn't like AT ALL, but his honesty helped me to accept the things I cannot change. I shared with him some things that I had never shared with anyone. He took it all in... We're willing to work through our differences because at this point, the good beats the bad by a landslide! So...FORWARD we shall go!



Why is that people never want to see you happy? I mean, what do haters get out of what they do?

Bloggers

I was going to blog about my more than scandalous weekend, but, I was tagged once again, by Terrance! I tried to run, but his nice words just made me do it!

The tag was for Blogger Apreciation Week. You have to pick 12 Bloggers to say something nice about, so here goes...In random order!


1.Terrance http://houstonny.blogspot.com/...I have been going to his site since his first day in blogland, and I have been hooked ever since! A fellow Texan who is smart, witty, is so much better than Tyra (LOL)!

2. Trent Jackson http://justasktrent.blogspot.com/ ... What more is left to say. Trent is just down right entertaining. No matter what day you go to his blog, he's got something for you! He is the leader by far in audio blogging in my book, and he keeps it real!

3.Chan http://diamondsrubiesncolapop.blogspot.com/ ... She takes me back to my roots. Through her blog, you can see that she is a loving,caring mother, who has lots of things lined up for the future. Her words help me to stay encouraged!

4. Jamal http://mrfranklinsplace.blogspot.com/ ... Jamal has a lot going on with him career wise. He is always on the move, making big things happen! He keeps me motivated to not settle for the American Dream, but rather look past it to make my own dreams come true!

5.Valentino http://kravme.blogspot.com/ ... This was one of the first blogs I read! He is highly intelligent, and has proven to be a talented writer! Between the turmoils of love and making money, he keeps you entertained. His random thoughts will have you saying, "I was just thinking the same thing."

6.Bobby Brown Jr http://beingbobbybrownjr.blogspot.com/ ... Bobby just tells it like it is. Even though he doesn't post that often, when he does, you better look out! He is a Slayer of Men with his words and will put something on you that you will never forget ( Too much like me for his own good!).

7.Ladynay http://ladynaynay.blogspot.com/ ... This is the first blog that I read in the morning because I know she will up and posting everyday before I do! She is funny, and her comments always have me rolling!

8. Omar http://legendofo.blogspot.com/ ... Just a down right sweetheart. This boy loves his family! As the leader in a pack of nine, it's no wonder that he doesn't want kids. He sings...He dances (I saw the pic of him shakin' it at ShawnQT's party!)...and he is just down to earth.

9. Derrick L. Briggs http://legendofo.blogspot.com/ ...aka Water... Is highly intelligent, and doing big things in New York. He keeps me wishing that could be a fly on the wall at one of his book club discussions...His posts always make me think!

10. InsanelySane http://nsaneleesane.blogspot.com/ ... This girl has a lot of heart! From her political rants to her daily events, she always has something to say!

11. Dizyaboy http://dizyaboy.blogspot.com/ ... This is one of my favorites...From his thought provoking questions to his Flashback Friday's, he keeps me going. I'm starting to think he got lost in Atlanta!

and last but not least..

12. I know I was supposed to do twelve...But I couldn't help myself...So this one, I' ll group into one.... In no particular order....


Southern Gal http://thoughtsofablacksoutherngal.blogspot.com/ .... If you want to know the truth about something, this is where you need to go! Her and those d*** gas prices are something else!

TTD http://itrynot2care.blogspot.com/ ... Through her blog, I can tell that she is hard working, and in LOVE! She can usually relate to the things that I am saying about my Boo!


Msnhim http://msnhim.blogspot.com/ ... This blog is one that you step into with caution. Sometimes her questions catch me off guard. She keeps me thinking about the issuses that come up in relationships, and just...real life sticky situations.

Nic http://superstarnic23.blogspot.com/ ... The soon to be Dr. Nic and her HAMs have me rolling! The pics that she posts will keep you laughing, and hopefully, she'll find what she wants on her quest to ecstasy.

Honey Libra http://alibrainthebalance.blogspot.com/ ... She always has a lot on her mind. She gets personal in her blog, and with her, you just getting the feeling that she is the real deal. Not some blogger hiding behind their words.

Darbs http://journey2joy.blogspot.com/ ... She is new to the blogging game, but she is quickly becoming one of my favorite bloggers! She speaks about her life from the heart, and enjoy reading all about it!

Men...You Gotta Love 'Em

Then men in my life spoil me to death...It's no wonder that I expect nothing but the best. I have slipped up in my choices with men over the years, but finally, when I took the time to actually listen to what they were saying, and not transforming their words into what I wanted to hear, I was able to weed out the BS and find a REAL man.

My Boo...

I am officially spoiled...Not that I wasn't already. I have been so busy, and yesterday my man left work early. He came by my house to help me finish up a presentation that I had for some international clients(It would have taken me forever if I had done it alone)...Cooked for me...Helped my daughter with her book report...Took her outside to ride her bike with the other kids in the neighborhood and played video games with her (While I took a long, hot bath...He wore her out playing, because she went straight to bed after she ate dinner and her bath!)...Gave me a full body massage...And rocked me to sleep! I love that man!

Oh yeah...He popped the question this weekend, but I talked him into waiting a while...I'll have to tell you the story at a later date...I love him...But I am just not ready to make that giant leap yet, and I WILL NOT do it until I am ready! He accepted my answer and the fact that I am not ready. I don't really think he's ready either. I think he just wants to make sure that I'm in his life for a very long time. I assured him that I wasn't going anywhere, anytime soon...You have to keep them on their toes. Now it seems he is working even harder to prove to me that he was meant to be with me. I love it. I stroke his ego on a regular basis, but I never tell him exactly what he wants to hear...It works very well for me, and keeps him from taking what he has for granted.


My Brother...

It has been hot as h*** in Texas the last couple of days. I wanted to get in my pool yesterday, but I had just gotten it cleaned, so I have to wait! My pool was a gift from my brother. I know it's a little selfish, but I kind of love the fact that he is not married and has no kids! He spoils the heck out of the ladies in his life(me, my mom, and my daughter). He is going to make some woman very happy. He said that he is officially tired of playing the field, and is looking to settle down with his current girlfriend, but he's going to give the relationship a little more time. I'm a little sad that things will change, but I am happy for my brother. We extremely close!


My Dad...

I have been a daddy's girl all my life. My father is strict, but he was the first man that I was able to deceive...I've been working my magic on him for a long time...He taught me many hard lessons. He has always called me his "Show Me" girl. He can tell me anything, but I have to see it to believe it. I learned the hard way, but I am very grateful, cause some of the things he stepped back and allowed me to experience, helped me to become the woman I am today.


My Grandpa...

I have been able to get anything I want from him, ALL MY LIFE....End of story!


The men in my life have taught me what unconditional love is. I think that is one of the main reasons that I don't need a man to validate me. They, along with my mother and aunts, have taught me to be strong. After taking time to reflect on my life, I have realized that I have a gift that many people will never know. A family that is full of love ( on my mother's side of the family of course). It's a rare kind of love and pride, that has been passed down through the generations. I have always wondered why people with issues gravitate towards me, but I have finally realized that it is because they see stability. In me and my family. As a family, we have taken in a lot of people along the way, and have helped them. I feel that my purpose in life is to help people who really NEED me.

Who spoils you? Your mother...Father...Your kids ( with little tokens of their affection, and smiles that shower you with love)...Your man...or YOU?

I know this was kind of a mushy post, but I was just feeling all sentimental today...

Not Feeling the Drama

I have come to the conclusion, that I am in the midst of a real life Soap Opera. The people around me really have issues. On the outside, they seem to have it all together. Financial stability, and all the perks that come with it...But mentally...Whew! They can be a tiresome bunch!

I have so much going on with me right now...Business ventures, my daughter's activities, my teen group, my family, my job and much more ....

I don't have much to blog about...Actually I do, but I'm just not feeling the drama today! Today is MY day, and I refuse to let it all get to me.

How was your weekend Bloggers?

He Knows My Secret...

On with the drama of the day!

I have a friend that has been dating this guy for a year. Their relationship just got very serious and they are planning to get married early next year. They met in college. She opted to go out of state and he lived in the area where she went to college. Her man's family is a bit dysfunctional, so he was hesitant about taking her to meet them. For the first time this past weekend, he took her out of town to meet his family. He talks to her all the time about how terrible his brothers are and how scandalous his mom and sisters are. He loves them, but he moved to get away from all the drama. He says that he is happy that he finally found someone that is real with him, and that he can trust, and he wants to start his own family with her.

My friend was having dinner with his family. She says, as they were eating in walks two of his brothers, and she froze. She couldn't breathe for a moment. His brother immediately recognized her, but didn't say a word. Her man introduced his brothers to her. Little did he know that she and one of his brother knew each other ...Very well. His brother used to be a bouncer at the club where she used to dance, her first two years of college. She used to do "favors" for him, and her would give her all kinds of things. Since then, she has turned her life around, and met the man of her dreams. The brothers look nothing alike, and they had two different last names, so she never associated the two together. They fished out the weekend, and she was on pins and needles until they got home.

So now she has a big problem on her hands. She still has not told her man about the situation. He has no clue that she used to strip, and he still does not know that she knows, and has slept with his brother on several occasions. He has noticed that she has been acting funny, but he just thinks that it was because she did not approve of the way his family lives. She called to me ask what she should do. I have no clue. If she tells him, she fears that he may never talk to her again, and call off the wedding. If she doesn't tell him, she feels that his brother may say something to him about it.

What do you think?

Would you want to be with someone who has slept with one of your siblings, even if they didn't know?

Do you think that love is really able to withstand all things, or are there exceptions to the rules?

Is It Me?

I didn't have any DRAMA yesterday...Whew! I just went shopping with my friends and had a wonderful evening with my daughter and my Boo! But you know I always have things on my mind, so here goes....

Is it me or does it seem like all the jeans are either low-rise, super low rise, or just straight falling off your a**? Now I',m a sister with a little junk in my trunk if you know what I mean. If I put on a pair of low rise jeans...Well, you know the rest...My friends were shopping with me yesterday(I shop too much), and one of them is a little thick (NOT fat), so we had the hardest time finding her an outfit. They have small sizes, and plus sizes, but what about the sisters in between? The ones with small waists and ghetto booties?

Is it me, or does it seem like most of the fine men are off the market? They are either married, in a relationship, or confused...I just count my blessings everyday, that I snagged a good one because the pickings are slim...

Is it me or are the kids of today in for a rude awakening? With the way the economy is going, and the mentality of our youth, I wonder what the world will be like in the next 30 years.

Is it me, or does it seem like they never have the cute shoes on sale in your size? The only one's you can find are the one that cost a grip!

Is it me, have the reality shows just gotten ridiculous? A. Idol needs to be cancelled after this season..End of story!

Is it me, or does it seem like you are never satisfied with amount of sex that you receive? You're horny...You have great sex...Then you're not satisfied, it just makes you want more great sex! If you're not getting any...That's another story!

Is it me or are gay men, the new wave of the future? My friend Diva went shopping with us yesterday, and got more play than all three of the ladies in the group? He was getting approached by men and women! I'm not a hater but d*** am I loosing my touch? (I was just glad to see him smiling again!)

Is it me, or does it seem like we go to school for all those years, and never use half of what we've learned? You either find a job that is not in your field of study, or you find a job in your field, but end up doing something that has nothing to do with what you've learned in school.

Is it me, or does it just feel so good to wake up in the morning, shower, and have nowhere to be at that moment? I love to be free to do what I want. I hate being on a schedule.

Is it me, or do kids have the ability to make you cry for no reason? My daughter hugged me yesterday, and smiled at me with the most innocent look in her eyes and I cried not only because she is the most beautiful gift that I have, but I cried because that innocence will be gone in the blink of an eye.

Is it me, or is love the most humbling experience there is? Love can make even the strongest people cry.

Is it me, or is it unfair that women have to work-out twice as hard as men? My friends and I are on an ab kick for the summer. We are having a contest for the sexist abs. We all put $20 into the pot every week, and it has been going on for a few months( so just in case we slip up we have time to recover). We are going on a trip this summer, and whoever wins, gets the money to spend on their trip. Why is my boy looking sexier by the day, and I'm about to kill my d*** self!

Is it me, or is everyone tagging these days? Actually, I have been tagged, yet again, and my answers are below.

I was Tagged by Derrick L. Briggs...


Hello my name is...
Luvin' Me ( You know I'm Incognegro!)

I was raised in...
Texas

The reason you are reading about me is...
Because you just wanna see what kind of questions I'll ask today.

Right Now I'm working on...
A project that is due tomorrow...Guess I won't be doing any shopping today!

The first thing I do in the morning is...
Hit the snooze button

The last thing I do at Night is...
Catch my breath and think, my Boo must have eaten his Wheaties!

My Momma always said...
Don't let them get to you.

I love it when people...
Are just happy for no reason at all. I just like positive people. They make the day so much better!

I hate it when people...
Have an excuse for everything

If you ever see me walking down the street ask me about...
Nothing...You know I don't like talking to people I meet on the street , Dang!

My notable run-in with the law...
I'm a good girl!

This one time at band camp I...
...Gave my man head while we were driving down the highway at night. No one could see us. He was getting sleepy, so I decided to wake him up. He almost wrecked his truck, but I don't think it had anything to do with him being sleepy.

Yo, you see this scar, I got this when I...
was hit by a car at 6 years old...You can't see it, but I know it's there.

The last time I swore I'd never drink was after a Night of...
My girl got drugged at a night club and the crazy a** bartender hid her behind the bar. We looked for her all night and finally found her when the club was about to close. I'm glad we got to her in time.

Future Projects and Plans...
After seeing the success that the club that I am a silent partner in is having, I'm thinking of opening a few more businesses of my own.

And before I leave I'd like to give a shout out to...
Everyone who reads my blog. Thanks for the Luv!

I'm tagging...Anyone who wants to do it!


You know I couldn't end my post without a question...What do you wonder about?

I'm Not Your Friend

Why do people feel the need to volunteer lies? I mean, my parents have money...SO WHAT! I work everyday like every one else...they do too!. People always want something for nothing! But I am not having it! I refused to be used by anyone. Been there, done that, learned my lesson....

You ain't gotta lie to kick it!

I'm as real as they come. A true friend to the end. Loyal and honest, to say the least. I don't judge people around me by their looks or financial status. We are who we are. I accept all people, from the prince to the pauper. I don't understand why people feel they have to lie to be my friend, or why some people want to be my friend at all. I don't have a sign around my neck saying, "I Want Friends," so LEAVE ME ALONE! If I don't invite you into my life, keep on moving!

I am not friendly. I am a very nice person, but I don't walk around making friends with people. As most of you know by reading my blog, I will ALWAYS help a friend in need, but don't try to be my friend to get something from me. We all have friends. Just because you associate with one of my friends does not make us cool. There is this chic, Alana, that seems to be everywhere I am. I mean that literally. It's getting kind of creepy.

I was sitting in dance rehearsal with my daughter last week. She was very excited because the instructor had allowed he to add something to the routine and she wanted me to see. Alana comes up to me and says hi. I know her through my friend Angel, but I don't KNOW her. She brings her daughter over to meet my daughter. This is where the creepiness begins...She says "Our daughter's are the same age." I smile politely and say, "Yes they are."
Alana: They dance in the same group.
Me: (No s*** Sherlock) I know.
Alana: Your daughter is very good.
Me: Thank you.
Alana: I heard that her grandmother was a choreographer at the local dance academy.
Me: Yep.
Alana: So she has natural talent. That's an big advantage.
Me(Okay, where is this conversation going?) She practices hard. She's a little perfectionist.
Alana: I need to make sure my daughter practices more.
Me: (Annoyed by the whole scene because I have missed what I came to see). Okay.(Walking away) You have a nice day now.

That was just the first run in I had with her. The next time I saw her, I was at the mall. The next day! She came to me and started talking about my car. She was like, "That ride must have cost you a grip." I said nothing. So she kept going. "You really believe in buying the best don't you?" I smiled, and still said nothing. She was wrecking my groove. This was supposed to be my alone time, and she was all up in my mix! I picked up a few things for myself and my daughter, then I got out of there. Why is it that I felt like she was behind me picking up the same things. Maybe it was just me...

I saw her again that week. Three times in one week. Like I said, creepy. This time I was out with my cousin(w/the 6 kids). We were talking about her "problem". She has been boosting for about 6 months. I knew it. That's why she stole from me...It was nothing to her. She said that she knew she had reached her lowest low when she stole from me. But we talked, and she said that she had a scare last week and she is done. I hope that's true because I love my family, but I am NOT going to take care of six kids while she sits in jail, and I let her know! She said that she didn't want them spilt up with their fathers and she would stop if not for herself, for her kids. I'm happy for her...If she's telling the truth.

Alana walked up to us wearing the same shirt that I had gotten a few days earlier when she saw me at the mall (Note to self...Take it back). I knew it! I don't know how she saw us. We were tucked away in a quiet little corner at this restaurant having lunch. Where did she come from? She spoke, and we spoke cordially, and then went back to our conversation. She was still standing there, waiting for us to invite her to sit down...Walk away...Just, walk away. My cousin says," May we help you?" She says to my cousin(stumbling over her words, "I love your hair. Who does your hair?" My cousin told her, and she finally walked away. I said, "That chic is weird." I called Angel when I got in the car, and told her about her girl. She said that it was strange, but she says that her friend has very low self-esteem.

This wasn't low self esteem, this was borderline crazy.

But it doesn't stop there. This is the creepiest of ALL. Tell me why I saw this chic while I was on my weekend get-away with my Boo? Now I know for sure this chic is following me! We were fishing and I look down the bank and who do I see, none other than Alana, with her husband, casting the line.

She sees me looking in her direction and come towards me. She say in a cheerful voice, "Hey girl." Then she introduces herself to my Boo, as my friend and starts a conversation with him. I gave her a half smile, and my perceptive Boo picked up on it, so he cut his conversation short. We stopped fishing and went back to the cabin. On the way back, my Boo says, "That was a weird chic, and she's your friend. I have pretty met most of your girls. Why haven't I met her before." He picked up on it from the start...Then I told him about all the coincidental meetings we kept having. We both thought it was strange, but nervously laughed it off and finished our weekend, uninterrupted. He warned my to stay away from her.

To avoid seeing her, I opted to let my daughter's dad take her to dance rehearsal. Sure enough, psycho asked him where I was. He said, "I don't know." She then says, "How can you have a kid by someone and not know where they are?" He was pissed, but let it slide. He said he just walked off from her and he and my daughter got in the car and left. While at practice, her daughter gave my daughter an invitation to her birthday party. I tore it up and threw it away. My daughter didn't seem to care much.

Out of no where, Alana calls me. She got my number the contact list from the dance studio! She says, "Will your daughter be attending the party this weekend? " I said, "No, we have something to do." I was tired of being nice. She was getting on my nerves. Then she says, "Maybe they can do something together next weekend." I finally just snapped. I said, "Look, our daughters aren't friends. They barely know each other, and I don't know you!" She didn't say anything for a moment, then she said, "Okay," and hung up.

She called me back and said, "I was just calling to apologize for making you upset earlier. We're still girls right? " Girls? Who the f*** are you? Leave me the h*** alone ( I didn't say it, I just thought it in my head!). Instead I said, "No, you are Angel's friend, not mine. You seem like a nice person, but I am kinda full right now in the friend department." Then she says, "so I've heard. You probably can't afford anymore." Instead of getting angry, I just said, "No, I can't. So I hope that means you will leave me alone now." So that was it. This chic was out to get money from me. Angel must have told her about her situation with her mortgage payments being behind and how we helped her. Now she was looking for a cash cow! What made her think that I would give her money? Angel had been my friend for most of my life. What was this chic thinking? Needless to say, I haven't heard from Alana since our last conversation...If I would have known that it would be that easy, I would have tried that a week ago. But I am being careful, she might try to do something to me. She showed too many crazy tendencies over the past week...Stalker tendencies. My friend Angel says that Alana came out and told her that she wants to hang with us. She likes how we roll, and how close we all are. Of course I said H** NAW. Angel said when she told her no, she started to cry. Huh? It's not that serious. We are not a celebrities or anything. We are just everyday guys and gals that like to have fun. I have never seen someone who wants to be another person's friend that bad!

Have you ever had anyone that wanted to be around you just to get something from you?

Have you ever had someone who just wanted to be around you in general, but you just weren't feeling them?

The Skin I'm In

What is with the color craze? I mean this light skinned, dark skinned thing.

I was born and raised in the south, and down here has always been different. To add to it, I was born to Creole parents. Well, my father is so pale, you would think he was a white man, and my mother is barely brown(as we call it), with red hair. So my brother and I are somewhere in the middle. Tan versions of my father. My mother's mother was Creole, but her dad wasn't, and that was frowned upon back in the day.
My dad's parents didn't approve of his marriage to my mother(since she was darker than he..Which is crazy to me), but they loved my brother and I to death, and finally came to grips with it when they had grandchildren. My mother taught us at a very young age to be proud of the skin that we're in, and to be proud of who we are.

My friend Jamie, moved into his first home over the weekend, and since I was not around, I decided to take everyone out to dinner last night to celebrate. Jamie is a handsome guy...He's one of the 80's/early 90's 'brothas(light-skinned w/curly hair), and hazel eyes. He brought his new friend to dinner last night. To me, this guy looked just like him. As a matter of fact, all of his guys look the same. Since we were all out to have fun, I thought I'd spice things up a little, so I brought the color thing up...Little did I know that my friend Diva was in rare form. He is a mess!

I like men...In all shades of brown. I don't discriminate.

Diva said what we were all thinking when we met the new guy. He said, "Is it me, or do you only date guys that look like you?"Jamie froze for a moment, then he said, "No, I just date people I am attracted to? "

Diva: So are you only attracted to high yellow guys with good hair?
Jamie: No, I am not that shallow, and besides, what is good hair anyway?
Diva: ( pointing around the table) Look around you. Most of the negros sitting at this table have good hair.
Me:(stating the line that my mother used to say): Any hair that Gods puts on our head is good.
Diva:(giving me a shut the h*** up look) You know what I mean. By the way, you are one to talk Missy. With that fine specimen sitting next you . With that almond colored skin and those deep dark eyes.

Now my man is cool with my friends (gay and straight), but I could tell that the comment made him a little uneasy. So I redirected the conversation, and I gave Diva a look that said shut the h*** up, or you will be paying for your own d*** meal...then I smiled sweetly.

Me: Diva, what is this all about? Is it me, or do I detect a little negativity in the air?
Diva: Shut up b****! ( I have been called that so much by my gay friends that it doesn't even phase me anymore. But, ONLY when they say it...But I could see that Diva was clearly upset.)

My Boo tugged on my sleeve, so I let it go, (I was about to unleash the dragon!) but Diva was not finished with Jamie.

Diva: So what's wrong with us brown brothas? We're not good enough for your high yellow a**?
Jamie: I thought you knew Diva, brown is in... But coffee is just not my cup of tea at the moment, if you know what I mean.

Diva started ranting with the regular...The " blacker the berry" charade...He is such a queen at times! I couldn't understand for the life of me why he was so upset. Why was he taking this so far.

Jamie: Diva is there something that you need to say to me?
(I was wondering the same thing)

Diva: I said it! It's time out for you pretty yellow boys overlooking us brown boys.

Being that I am a straight female...I was like what? I see dark and light skinned people together all the time. Was this something that existed only in his head, or was this something that existed among the gay community? I was confused, to say the least. We all saw that arguing with him was useless, so we dropped the subject all together and started talking about decorating the new house. Jamie has some good ideas, and the perfect queer eye for decorating and design. I can't wait to see it when he is finished! I know it will be a spectacle. His loft looked like a museum, but a whole house...

Diva did not say a word the rest of the night...

Being that we are close, I had to find out what was wrong with my friend. Jamie was concerned as well. Since I had rode with my Boo and Jamie had rode with his new friend, we sent them both on their way, and stayed behind with Diva. I climbed into the front seat of his car and Jamie got into the back seat. Then Jamie said, "Talk. "

We pulled out of the parking lot and Diva started bawling! I mean, not one of those cute little cries, but he was sobbing! We made it to Jamie's house and we all get out and went inside. Diva is still crying. H***, by now both Jamie and I were crying and we didn't have a clue what we were crying for. We were all a mess. Diva was crying, and we were crying because he was hurting.

Diva finally told us why he was crying. He said that he was a product of his mother's first marriage to a dark-skinned man. She later married a light skinned man and had 4 more kids, who were all fair skinned. He said that he had been teased in his home all his life by his siblings, and his stepfather, and it had a lasting affect on him. Then he said that he had been dating this guy(for about 6 months) that he had really fell for, and the guy just stopped calling him all of a sudden. I had heard about him, but had never seen him, so I never questioned it. He said that the guy hadn't called since Friday, and he had never missed one day of calling. The guy finally called on Monday afternoon and asked him to meet him. He said that all this time, he thought the reason that the guy never wanted to go out in public with him was because he was not completely OUT and he was giving him the time he needed to do what he had to do. But the guy told him that it had nothing to do with him being gay, it was the fact that he was so dark. He didn't want people he knew seeing him with such a dark guy and telling his family. The guy that Diva was dating was Creole, and his family hated dark people, so he felt that before they got too serious, he would cut it off, so he wouldn't have to introduce him to his family. He said that his family accepted the fact that he was gay, but would not welcome a dark skinned gay man. He was ashamed of him. He said that the guy couldn't even look him in the eye (What a coward!).

This is 2006 people. Is this small minded perception still going on? What my parents went through was over 30 years ago in New Orleans, but this is the new millennium! This is Texas!My friend is one of the finest chocolate brothers I have seen. Skin like a baby's bottom... He's about 6'2" tall, with a sprinter's build. Believe me, he has NOTHING to be ashamed of. I guess when you are on the outside looking in, you think people have it all. Once you tap inside those walls, you see the weakness lurking behind the beauty.

My friend cried, not for the fact that he was gay, but for the reason that he was dark, and at that moment, he hated it because it was the one thing keeping him from the man he loved. Jamie assured him that he would find someone better. Someone to accept him as he is. We cried with him, because few words can comfort a broken heart. After he got himself together, he dropped me off at home. I am determined to keep him as drunk, full, and happy as possible this week. We are going shopping later in the week...It's the best therapy! Who knows, he might find something new (besides clothes)!

I love my friends...In all shapes, forms, and fashions!


So what do you think of this light/dark skinned facination? Did you have any issues with it growing up? Do you have a preference as far as dating is concerned?

My Weekend is Over...

I have been locked up in a lakeside cabin for 2 and a half days with a man I adore. I feel wonderful! No friends, no family, no one's problems, and most importantly, no phone! I need to get away more often...

Have you ever been around a person that you NEVER get tired of. Don't get me wrong, my Boo and I enjoy our own space, but we never get to the point to where we just have to get away from each other. When we are together, we are like teenagers again. I get the giggles, and I am happy for no reason at all. He gets a little silly too. This weekend, we went camping. I am not the "outdoorsie" type, so I would never make it in a tent, or in an RV. He calls me a "girlie girl." My Boo loves nature. He appreciates everything about it from the trees to the water. My allergies say otherwise, but I try to get into the things that he is into, as well as he tries to do the same. He even sits through the ballet. So with a double dose of my allergy meds in my system, and plenty at hand, we opted to stay in our cabin for the weekend. That way, he got to frolic in the great outdoors, I had the luxury of indoor plumbing. We fished, hiked, shot the bow and arrow(actually I am very good at archery), rode mountain bikes, and HE did ALL the cooking, so it was great! He has been taking a culinary class and he wanted to show me his skills. I was impressed!

I only had one big scare this weekend. I am TERRIFIED of snakes. We came across one while we were hiking. It was just sitting there, looking at us. Now I have watched enough National Geographic and Discovery Channel specials to know that snakes will attack without being provoked. When I saw it, I couldn't move...But just like that, it was over. My Boo shot it so fast that I didn't even have time to scream. I had jitters for the rest of the day. I don't know if it was the snake or the gunshot, but I was jumping at even the slightest noise. I was checking all the corners of the house, the closets, the cabinets...I didn't want any surprises. So we stayed inside the remainder of the weekend. Which wasn't so bad at all...If you know what I mean.

When you love someone, you learn to appreciate the small things about them, and you learn to tolerate the things that you dislike. Camping being one of those things for me.

So, the questions for today are (I don't expect you to answer them all)...

How much sex is too much sex?

How much time do you enjoy spending with your mate?

What things could you NOT tolerate in a relationship?

What things are a MUST HAVE for your partner?

What is an ideal relationship to you? Does it even exist? (Before I was in a good relationship, I couldn't answer this question...)

You Think You Know, But You Have No Idea...

I believe that people can only teach what they know. How can a person give advise on something that they have never experienced? One of my main reasons for blogging, is it obtain true un-biased opinions on the situations going on in my life, from people who don't know me personally. That way, my personal relationship with them does not affect the opinions I receive.

But, on with the drama for the day....

I have a good friend. She is not in my circle of friends because they do not get along with her. They are exact opposites. They are Saks, she is Walmart. But she has been my friend for a long time, so I hang out with her from time to time. I hadn't seen her in a long time, and she had not met my Boo yet, so we decided that she and her male friend would meet my Boo and I for dinner last night after my teen session.

We met at a nice little restaurant close to my house. My friend is a cute girl, just a little rough around the edges. She speaks her mind, and doesn't care what people think of her. She lacks the polishing of a lady, but she can hold her own. Her friend was really nice...well spoken, handsome, built nicely, and well dressed. She was impressed with my Boo as well. We had dinner and laughed it up for about 3 hours.

We went our separate ways...then, she called me when I got home. She told me how she had just broken up with her boyfriend, and this man came in and swept her off her feet. She was bragging about the guy she was seeing. I listened. Then she started asking questions about my Boo. I answered, but every time I said something about him, she tried to say something better about her friend. After I realized the direction the conversation was going, I decided to put a little twist on it. I asked if she and her friend were in a relationship, or if they were just dating. She said that she sees him often, but they are just dating.

Then the truth came out. Normally when a person brags on their mate like that, they are covering an emotional void within themselves, or the person they are seeing. She said that she had to practically beg him to meet us for dinner. She said that he only spends the night on Monday or Tuesday, never the weekend. He likes to have lunch with her on the other days, never dinner. On the days that he spends the night with her, he always leaves in the early the next morning, in the same gym clothes every time. Strange Huh? He told her in the beginning, that he was looking for love. They have been dating for a while, and every time she talks about a relationship, he starts to get antsy, or avoid the conversation all together. She said he leaves his cell phone in his car when they are together. Hmmm...

My question to her of course was, did you talk to him about it. She said, "I afraid that if I tell him what I feel, he'll feel like I'm being jealous and just I will lose him." Then I countered with, " From what you're saying, it sounds like you don't have him. It sounds to me like he is either married or involved in another relationship."

She didn't take that comment well at all. She goes off on me about how I think I'm in this perfect relationship when in fact, my Boo may be the one cheating. I could have gotten mad at her and went along with the whole charade but with my quick wit and razor tongue I said," I know where my man is every night...do you? If he is in fact yours?" She stopped talking. She, as all of my other friends know that once I get started, it's over. Words can cut like a knife, and I carry a machete at all times.

I am not a relationship expert. I just work to make MY relationship the best it can be. I tend not to give relationship advise to friends. I told her, as I would have told any of my friends, to go with her gut feeling. No one knows that man like she does, because she is the one who has been with him. Do what she felt was right for her situation. I got off the phone, took a shower, and took care of my own business that had just gotten out of the shower and was lying across my bed...

Why is it that we think that the cure for losing a mate is gaining another?

If you are broken, and haven't had time to heal, is it fair to bring those feelings into a new relationship?

Is the new relationship then one of dependency and convenience, or could you truly fall in love with the new person because you feel like they can "take away the hurt?"

You Really Don't Want Me To Answer That Question...

I am not one to call people ugly. I know there are a lot of unattractive people out there, but I have made it a habit to not judge or talk about people. I try to stay positive, as much as possible. I know that beauty comes from within, and seeing only the outward appearance is vain. But what do you do when U-G-L-Y stares you in the face and asks your opinion?

Why is it that ugly people make it a habit to talk to you, and expect you to say something nice. We are a product of our parents genes. You mix them up, and you get what you get. It's like rolling dice.

I hate allergy season. Especially, for my daughter ....I am sitting in the packed waiting room of my daughter's doctor's office yesterday afternoon, and this couple is sitting next to me. They are playing with their baby. The lady smiles and makes the comment that my daughter is cute. I say thank you and proceed to stare blankly at the episode of Sponge Bob that is showing on the screen in the office. Now you know the creepy feeling that you get when someone is staring at you( I had it)...I look up to see both parents staring at me, as if they are waiting for me to say something. They smile, but they don't say anything. But they keep looking at me.

The baby then crawls into the mother's lap and she says, "Hey cutie pie". She continues to talk to the baby while bouncing him on her knee and smiling. Then she turns to me and says, "Do you want to hold him?" I love kids, but today is not the day. I give her a strained smile and said, "Oh no thank you, he seems pretty happy with you." She smiles and tells me the whole story of how she tried for son long to have a baby and she finally had one. Okay lady. I'm happy for you, but today is just not the day. Then she waits for me to comment. I say nothing, I just go back to watching Sponge Bob....All the while I am thinking...When are they going to call us back to see the doctor?

I AM NOT FRIENDLY, but I'm not rude either. If someone that I don't know says something to me, I say something in response, just being cordial. I guess I look approachable. People always talk to me. Why? I have no clue. I guess it's the southern hospitality. Yesterday, I was in no mood for conversation. I just wanted to get into the doctor's office and out. But this lady would not let up. She was determined to talk to me!

The lady says to me. "Isn't he gorgeous? " Why did she ask me that question? I was hoping that she wouldn't say that! I should have taken a pic of that kid with my phone...Then you would see what I am talking about!

Are we looking at the same kid? I mean, I don't like to call people's kids ugly, but this kid was...Well you know. I could not lie to her. First of all, I did not want to talk to this lady and she is forcing me into an unwanted conversation. Second, she is asking me a question that she already knows the answer to. Why should I have to comment on her kid because she commented about mine. I didn't ask her if my daughter was cute. She felt the need to tell me so...She looks at me awaiting my answer ( I have to think fast) so I say, " He looks just like both of you." She smiles, satisfied with the answer. Whew, that was close.

She did not stop there. She handed the baby to me ANYWAY. I don't reach for him, she just sits in my lap. I am like WTF! I am thinking, lady, I don't know you. I already told you that I don't want to hold that kid! Not because I don't like kids, I just don't feel good! My allergies are acting up, and I am ready to go home! I am in a foul mood because I feel bad, and just don't want to be bothered. Leave me the h*** alone and get your kid...Mind you that she had been bouncing him the whole time. Then...It happens! As soon as she handed him to me, the baby spit up on my off white linen top! I bought it last year, but it was my first time wearing it. You know it is when you find a cute shirt, but you wait until you have the perfect pants and shoes for it before you bring it out of the closet! NO! NO! NO! She quickly grabs the baby and apologizes, and tries to help me clean my shirt. I go to the bathroom and clean it the best that I can. As soon as I come out, they call my daughter's name. D***!

I must have been glaring at this woman because she keeps apologizing and her husband tries to hand me $20 to pay for my shirt to be cleaned. I didn't take the money. I just wanted those people away from me. Why didn't she just leave me ALONE in the first place!

Do you tell people that their kids are cute when you KNOW they are not?

Do you have unattractive people around you that don't know it?

Do you hate it when people just talk to you because you are in the same place at the same time, or is it just me?

Over-Protective of My Stuff

I was introduced to the finer things long ago by my parents. They worked hard, and we pretty much got what we wanted. So when I met a man that could give me those things, I thought it was a match made in heaven( I was young, and silly back then). I told the story in a very personal post titled Be Careful What You Wish For. Now, I am in a place where I can afford the things that I want, and I hate for people to come to my place and bother my stuff. Respect My House! All visitors must remember that my thing belong in my house, the people are just passing through.

I have always been generous. I will give you the "shirt off my back" if you need it. But if I don't give it to you, it's not meant to be yours.

I work from home, so I am at home a lot. I only go into the office about once a week to check on things. People stop by my place all day long. I am picky about my things. If I put my money into it, then I believe that it should be taken care of. My house is always clean, and the things in it are expensive. When my daughter got to an age where she didn't bother things around the house anymore, I started to upgrade my place. New, contemporary furniture, media room(a gift from my dad), marble on the kitchen floor and the entire bathroom, and hardwood flooring throughout my house. I replaced all the lighting fixtures, put in French doors. My place has a lot of charm. I increased the value on my house tremendously! It was custom built, on a pier and beam foundation. My brother is a structural engineer, as he likes to be called( he also has a degree in architecture), so the design of my home cost me nothing. He showed me what to look for when building a home a home. My uncle owns his own contracting company( he started out as a construction worker and built his company from the ground up), so I didn't have to pay for labor, I just had to buy the materials, and I got them at wholesale prices through him. So I didn't have to pay much to get it done. That's the benefit of having a big family. And needless to say that most of us have a skill that we use to help our family. People look at our family , and think that we are rich, but we are not rich in the sense in which they give us credit for. We are rich in love and support. We are just hard- working people that KEEP IT IN THE FAMILY! It's hard to do, because everyone does not " play fair', but we do it. And for that, we are all successful..We do have a few black sheep (my cousin w/ the 6 kids, a crack head, a career student, and a shop-a-holic who shops away her bill money), but we take care of their trifling behinds too.

With all that said, I hate for people to try to get over on me. I think fast, so not too much can get past me, I just let people think they know what they are talking about. No one likes a know- it - all...I have noticed 3 things missing in my house. A Chi iron( $147.00), a bottle of perfume, SABI By Henry Dunay( a $225.00 gift from my mother that I have never used), and my Manolo Rhinestone-Trim Sandals ($595.00...I have only worn them once, and they were a gift from my Boo) . That's almost $1000 worth of s*** missing from my house!

My Boo and I are going on a weekend rendezvous, and I have been trying to see what I have at home to wear, so I'll know what I have to shop for. I noticed them missing, so I decided to do an inventory of my things. I couldn't find them anywhere. My Boo starts and one end of the house, and I start at the other. We both came out empty handed. I don't want to suspect my friends or family, but they are the only people who have been in my house in the past couple of weeks.

It's sad but, the first person that I came to mind was my jealous cousin with the six kids. She watches everything that I wear, my hair...I mean everything! She wears the same shoe size, and she commented about the shoes when I wore them. She has been to my house a lot over the past couple of weeks, trying to plan the birthday party. I have known her all my life, so I can look her in the face and tell when she is lying. So I went with my gut feeling, and went over to her house and asked if she saw my shoes. She got offended. She said, Why in the h*** would I know where your shoes are? I'm not your housekeeper?" She must be getting better, because I couldn't read her. I couldn't tell whether she was really offended, or if she was trying to cover a lie. I actually felt bad for a split second. So I left it alone. She got a phone call and walked out of the room to talk. Now you know kids will tell you the truth, and little girls, especially, love to go through their mothers things. So I knew my next target would be her oldest daughter. I know, I know... but I want me s*** back!

I said, "Hey Naiya, come talk to your big cuz for a sec." She came to me smiling. She is too cute. I said, your hair is so pretty. How did your mom get your hair so straight and shiny? She said, "I'll bring it to you." Low and behold, she brought me my d*** Chi iron. I know it was mine because I bought the pink one to support breast cancer research). I took it from her and marched right up to her mother, who was sitting on a barstool, talking on the phone. She said, "Where did you get that? Have you been going through my stuff?" I knew the that she was guilty. I try not to make a scene because her kids are in the house, but I grabbed her before I knew it. My Boo, who had been sitting on the couch watching a movie with the kids, came into the kitchen and grabbed me. How did he get in there so fast? I let her go. She started crying, and without a word, went and got my shoes and my perfume.

I was too mad at her to say anything. I just got my things, hugged and kissed the kids, and left before I did something that I may regret later. My own blood stole from me, and then lied about it. I had just helped her with the party, then cleaned up afterwards...And she still didn't feel the need to give me my s*** back. If she would have just brought it back, I would have been mad, but I would have given her credit for returning my things! At least I would have known that she had a conscience. Now it makes me question how she had gotten ahead this long. Maybe she has been stealing all along...She has the money to buy what she needs. Maybe she has a REAL problem. Being that she is my family, I know this is not the end of this, so I made a mental note to discuss this with her later. Maybe my cousin really needs help...Here I go again, making the culprit into the victim...

On the ride home, my daughter said, "Why was cousin TT crying. Did she get some bad news on the phone?" I just said that people are sad when they do things that they are not supposed to do...and as you other parents know, the Q&A session was under way. I was so glad to make it home. I was really not in the mood to answer questions, but I knew she hadn't done anything to upset me...and it would be unfair for me to take my frustration out on her...so I just answered all her questions.

When we got in the house, my Boo says, "You are such a good person with a big heart. I don't know why people feel the need to take from you, when you give them so much." I replied, " It seems like even my best is not good enough for some people. But I am blessed, so I will continue to give to people who really need it." The he kisses me on the cheek and said, "That's one of the many reasons why I love you." Then he looked at me and said with a chuckle, "Have you ever considered taking an anger management class? I'm starting to feel like a boxing trainer." I looked at him smiling and said, "I've considered it, but people would have to stop messing with me for it to be effective." He agreed, and we left it at that.

I wish for one day people would just let me be the lady that I am...

Has someone close to you stolen from you?