Some People Just Don't Get It

Society manipulates our minds into thinking that we have to 'fit in." What is really IN? Must we spend our lives wondering, "is my butt too big...Hair too short, too nappy...Do I switch a little too hard?" It's a crazy world out there, and sometimes, you left with no amswers.

I love basketball! I don't play, but I love to watch the game. I spend A LOT of time with my friends, that's why they are mentioned in so many of my posts. They are ALWAYS around. My friends and I went to a Sport's Bar last night to watch the Mavs game. I introduced my circle long ago in a post titled Friendship. We were all out last night, including Angel(my girl with the dog husband)...With the exception of High Class. My circle consists of both gay and straight men...And that's what started this craziness.

The waitress brought a drink over to my friend Ambitious. He gave her a strange look and said, "I didn't order this." She told him that it had been sent to him by a gentleman that was seated at the bar. He was like " WHAT?" He sent the drink back. The guy gave him the dirtiest look. We finished watching the game with no more distractions, and then we all decided to talk for a while. The guy, who had not moved from his chair since we had been there, approached our table. He asked to speak with Ambitious. Ambitious told him that anything he had to say to him, could be said in front of his friends. The man began to go off on my boy! He said that it was very rude of him to refuse his drink. He started this long drawn out argument about how and why gay black men can't find decent, faithful partners. He said that the gorgeous guys think that they are too good for the world, and they put others down. He felt he had to say something about it.

Ambitious was livid. He turned to the guy and said, "I'm Not Gay!" The man had a puzzled look on his face. He said that he assumed my friend was gay, because he was sitting at a table with at least 3 gay men and a couple of women. We are all like...WTF! The guy turned and walked away without saying another word. Society has now flipped the script! Here we had a gay man, assuming that a straight man was gay because he had gay friends! We have all known each other for years! We played hide and seek together! Ambitious had fought many fights for my friend Diva because he was so flamboyant(even when we were younger), but he loved him as a friend. Now he was having to defend himself because he was friends with gay men. Diva used to play dress up with me and my girls. My parents never really said anything, they just let him be himself. That's why he used to love coming to my house. He didn't have to hide who he was. My dad was more worried actually about Ambitious coming over. He always sat outside with us when the boys came over.

Why are people so twisted? What is wrong with a straight man having gay friends? Especially if they have been friends since childhood? Being gay doesn't change who my friends are on the inside. It changes WHO they want to be involved with? Does that exclude them from needing love and friendship from the people that mean the most to them? We have had this conversation so many times in my circle. I used to be ridiculed for having gay friends. I could care less what people say. I love those boys, and nothing can change that. I found myself taking up for them...But they weren't the ones who needed help. It's these other stupid a** people out there. I think that feeling comes from insecurity that people have with themselves and their sexuality. People should know themselves before they question others! My friends know and accept who they are, and so do we. It takes a real man/woman to be able to accept who they are, and reach out to others no matter what their sexaul orientation is. I am so proud to be in a circle with secure, black, men and women!

I was asked by a co-worker, how can I be a Christian, and hang out with gay men. I told her that the God I serve loves ALL people just the same. If my gay friends had any sins that they needed to repent for, it was between them and God, just like the sins that both she and I have. Is it worse for me to sleep with a man that I'm not married to, than it is for my gay friend to do so? It's sinning no matter what package you put it in! That shut her up!

I can't conrol society, but I can question the way people around me think. This post leaves me with so many questions...Can straight men/women have gay friends and not question their own sexuality? I think so, but what do you think?