The Do's and Don'ts of My Life...

For those of you that are going through something, know that you are not alone. We all go through things. The difference between the way we handle our situations determines how they affect our lives in different ways. Just because you don't read about it, doesn't mean it's not there...

If someone that you care for says something to you that hurts you, don't say something harsh back. I know at the time it feels like the right thing to say, but if you really care about that person, you'll regret it later. Words are permanent. Take what they have said. Think about it. If it's true, accept that it is a part of you, whether it is good or bad. If you choose to remain the same way, and if you are happy being that way, then continue to be who you are... If you know for a fact that what they have said is untrue, let them know that it's not true. After that, leave it alone. You have done your part. Although it may be hard, let it go. Don't use up all your space, meaning, don't overflow yourself with negative thoughts that hinder positive things from happening in your life.

Don't allow someone else's opinion to control how you act or react when faced with certain situations. You must stand firm in the choices and decisions that you have made in your life. Some may be good, and some may not, but in the end it was your choice.

Don't fall into the web. It's hard to stay out of situations. Especially when people come to you with their problems. One hard lesson that I am still learning is, being a friend does not mean that I have to part of every aspect of your life. If you don't want my true opinion about a situation then don't tell me about it at all because I am going to give it you! If people bring negative things to you all the time there is obviously a reason. My reason was, I always listened to it...but I'm learning.

Be honest with yourself and others around you. I've learned that holding things in to keep from hurting the feelings of someone that I care about only hurts them more in the end. If someone has done something to you that you don't like, tell them. Number one, so they'll know. Number two, so they'll think twice before doing it again.

The chain starts with you. I was having a conversation with someone yesterday about family. Some people have good ones, some people don't. That's life. If you don't like how your family life is, it is up to you to change it for your future generations. If your parents/siblings/mates/relatives did things to that you didn't like, don't turn around and expose your kids to the same behavior. There was a point in my life where my brother and I were completely cut off from one of my aunts. Once she saw that my mother was not going to allow her to ruin her family, she came around, slowly but surely. If people value you as a person, they will do what they have to keep you in their lives. If they don't, they will let go. You just have to be ready and willing to make the sacrifice.

There is nothing wrong with solitude. Sometimes it takes being alone to truly be able to appreciate companionship. If my man would have come into my life when I was younger, there is no way our relationship would be like it is today. I had to grow and love me first before I could love him and accept his love the way that I do. ..without fault...without doubts. We all have issues to work through whether we choose to acknowledge them or not...I had to repair and rebuild my life in order to have the life that I am striving to have now. Being the way that I am was a decision that I made by myself. With no input from anyone else. No one else knows me that way that I know me.


Always remember...Take care of you! No one can ever love you like you do.

I have to remind myself...I am not now, nor will I ever be, a bad person. I am a good person who has made some bad decisions...But I am forever growing, forever changing, forever learning...and most certainly forever Luvin' Me.