Just a Day In My Life

My best friend and I went out to the bar last night, and we met a couple of nice guys, Toni and Erin. Young, black, successful...you know, nice. Just out for a night of harmless fun. We order a few drinks, then we decide to go down the street to a local pool hall. The crowd in this place was dead. The pool hall, now that was a different story. You would have thought that it was the first of the month and they were taking food stamps for payment. There were people everywhere. As we are shooting pool, we talk about all sorts of things. The conversation of sexuality soon arises. It seems to always come up in my girls' conversations, seeing that she dated a gay guy or should a say a 'closet gay' for about four weeks, and didn't know it. He was in denial. So now, that is one of the first question that she asks. When asked, Erin got offended. He was making the comments like, "Do I look gay?"

I asked, "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" He was livid! He began ranting and raving about how we as black women should watch what we say. I still refused to back down from this guy. I wanted to know how a person 'looks' gay. I have several nice looking gay friends. They don't have a certain look. They look like people to me. Toni explained to us that Erin was homophobic (I think it's more of a fear of the unknown. People choose to be homophobic because they don't want to reveal their true selves. It's a cop out. They would much rather hate someone, than to evaluate their feelings and accept people for who they are. In turn, they show their own weakness.) He had an episode a few years back with this guy, and refused to accept what had happened. Of course, I had to probe into the situation further. I wanted to know why he didn't answer the question. Finally, Toni told us that he was , bisexual, and Erin refused to accept that his friend of 15 years might be gay. I feel that if Erin was a true friend, he would accept his boy fro who he is. After talking a little more, Toni began to calm down a little. I explained to him that it is hard enough for his boy to come to him and let him know what is going on in his life.

Erin was happy now and actually asked for my number. Talk about bipolar. I chose to avaid the issue,making up the excuse that I was tired of being hurt, and really wasn't looking for anything. he looked disappointed, but he was cool. My friend got Toni's number, as a friend of course. I think he'll mesh into our circle pretty well.

I went home and payed the sitter, looked in on my daughter(who was fast asleep), and called "old faithful". He is a guy that I sleep with on occasion, and is always a telephone call away. We choose to keep the relationship sexual, because we are at two different places in our lives. No strings, no questions. We get "tested" together. That was a stipulation of our strictly sexual relationship. It's easier for me to keep it that way. He's in his second year of law school, and I am not looking for a man in my life right now. He gives it took me on a regualr basis and the shit is wonderful. He also respects my house rules. He can only come when my daughter is asleep and has to be gone before daylight when she is at home. It works well for the both of us. Good sex with no drama!